In this UU shotgun I plow through Twitter's new state-label accounts, a review of the new horror movie Nefarious, the recent horror-show of an election for Chicago's mayor, and some excellent college recommendations. Then I think through how progressivism is not only mutilating both bodies and reason, but celebrating that; and demanding that we celebrate that! I end the show with a reflection on Jesus' parable of the talents. Was he teaching a divine embrace of capitalism? Was he teaching we can earn our salvation? Come laugh and think with me!